{"id":61497,"date":"2019-08-20T11:49:06","date_gmt":"2019-08-20T08:49:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp.929.org.il\/?p=61497"},"modified":"2023-03-14T12:03:37","modified_gmt":"2023-03-14T10:03:37","slug":"a-guide-to-bidding-farewell","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp.929.org.il\/en\/a-guide-to-bidding-farewell\/","title":{"rendered":"A Guide To Bidding Farewell"},"content":{"rendered":"
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“When David\u2019s life was drawing to a close, he instructed his son Solomon as follows…” (verse 1).<\/span><\/p>\n

This chapter relates David’s demise. It is read as the <\/span>haftarah<\/span> of the portion of <\/span>Vayechi<\/span><\/em>, which relates the demise of the patriarch Jacob and his son Joseph.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Although these two readings discuss death, they are not about dying but rather about life. A life that was lived and lives that will be lived.<\/span><\/p>\n

Not everyone is as lucky as Jacob or David, who were fortunate enough to leave this world <\/span>compos mentis<\/em> <\/span>surrounded by their children. This farewell setting, in which the entire world is condensed into a single room, enables the dying person to observe his deeds and his progeny and share his values, feelings and hopes with them.<\/span><\/p>\n

A “Good” Farewell<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

As a rule, we do not like saying goodbye. It is not only difficult for us to part in the time of death, but also in our daily interactions. Dropping a child off at daycare is difficult; when our teenager is away from home for a few days, it is an emotional challenge for us, and we shed emotional farewell tears bringing our child to the marriage canopy. We go to great lengths to avoid bidding farewell to someone close to us, due to the emotional difficulty involved.<\/span><\/p>\n

However, our leaders acted differently and taught us what it means to bid farewell with eyes wide open and from a position of strength. They teach us that everyone eventually dies, but it is not a final end. When a person dies, his or her values and the impression they left in the world remain.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

According to modern psychology, two key fears make it difficult for us to say farewell \u2013 a fear of loneliness and a fear of losing control. Both Jacob and David experienced solitude and loss of control during their lifetimes. As they take leave of this world, they provide us with coping strategies: forging an intimate relationship between parents and children (the father invites his children to his deathbed) helps cope with loneliness, and trust in God helps cope with loss of control.<\/span><\/p>\n

We are sometimes caught unprepared for bidding farewell. It would be wise to start practicing how to say goodbye.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Let us prepare to say goodbye by regularly telling our loved ones how much we love them, what we learn from them and what our hopes for them are.\u00a0 Let us learn to live our lives according to the values that are important to us and strengthen family ties. Now is the time to practice letting go and put our trust in God.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

We may not be kings or patriarch, but nevertheless saying goodbye is part of our lives and it can become a key for living a meaningful life.<\/span><\/p>\n

Translated by: Chava Wilschanski<\/span><\/p>\n

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